मंगलवार, दिसंबर 19, 2006

INDIAN VIRUSES ! BETTER BEWARE OF THEM !

P.V. Narasimha Rao Virus: First of all, this virus reduces the CPU speed to 66Hz. Before executing any instruction, it deleberates over it a number of times and finally does nothing.

V.P. Singh Virus: This virus reserves a quota for each instruction, and executes them only according to the quota. Needless to say, the least used instructions have a higher quota than the more used instructions. This virus is also known as social justice virus.

Sukh Ram Virus: This virus first swallows 10% of the bits in each instruction and then executes them.

Maneka Gandhi Virus: This is a green virus. It executes only those programmes that were written by vegetarians or animals.

L.K. Advani Virus: This virus pops up every now and then, and the only way you can continue working is by typing Jai Shri Ram 108 times.

Phoolan Devi Virus: This virus hijacks all high priority processes and generates page faults for them. At times, this virus may also celebrate the CPU*s birthday.

K.P.S. Gill Virus: Only ladies need to worry about this virus.Every now and then the users get a whack, you know where.

Deve Gowda Virus: The main characterestic of this virus is that it tries to schedule all the processes at the same time. This virus services all the request for resources,and allocates them irrespective of whether they are available or not.

Jayalalitha Virus: This actually is a family of viruses. Each member of this virus family grab as much of hard disk space as possible,while the main virus is totally unaware of it. When everything stops working,this virus blames the user for the whole chaos.

I.K.Gujral Virus: Before executing any instruction, this virus calls tries to get the approval of 18 other viruses and most of the time, one of the viruses blocks the instruction. So Gujral virus most of the time does not execute anything. While it is not doing anything, as it is always, this virus connects to the Internet and keeps sending data to all major/minor countries in the World except India w/o receiving the replies.

Veerappan virus: This virus plays hide and seek. it captures some resources and releases them after sometime. it sometimes seems to be eradicated but suddenly reappears.

Laloo Yadav virus: A dangerous virus, gulps all the resources as well as it corrupts the data. If you try to use scanner, During hibernation,it will rename its signature with another deadly virus of the same family. This virus takes help from other viruses to avoid scanning.

Mulayam Virus: Whatever way, it will try to grab resources of the system, it's only task is to abort BJP processes. this virus hangs the system by sending conflicting signals to different hardware units.

Sonia Gandhi Virus: Once a part of most deadly virus family of the world. No scanner can detect now, how much damage it can cause to the system, but people use Bofors scanner for temporary protection.

Kashi-Maya Virus: It's also called the Dalit virus, it destabilizes the co-ordination amongst different resources, It controls & steps the low priority resources from functioning. Lot of scanners available now to kill it. Other viruses are thriving by splitting this virus.

Musharaf In Tunnel


Vajpayee, Musharraf, Madhuri Dixit and Margaret Thatcher are traveling in a train. The train suddenly goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. Thatcher and Vajpayee are sitting there looking perplexed. Musharraf is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.
Thatcher is thinking: "These Pakistanis are all crazy after Madhuri. Musharraf must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him"
Madhuri is thinking: "Musharraf must have moved to kiss me, and kissed Margaret instead and got slapped."
Musharraf is thinking: "Damn! it, Vajpayee must have tried to kiss Madhuri, she thought it was me and slapped! me."
Vajpayee is thinking: "If this train goes through another tunnel, I could make another kissing sound and slap Musharraf again."

If Laloo was to be PM again

Laloo Hamara Neta What would be changed if Laloo Prasad becomes India's Prime Minister: again

1. National Anthem : Khana Pina Adhik Zaroorat hai...

2. National Attire : Dhoti & Kurta
3. National Drink : Fresh Buffalo Milk
4. National Animal : Buffalo, from Bihar
5. National Sport : Milking Buffalo (morning) Buffalo Race (evening)
6. Corporate Language : Enlish-va
7. National Toy : A. K. 58
8. National Family Planning Policy : Hum Do, Humare Dozen
9. National Documentry Film : Laloo Ban Gaya Gentleman
10. National Vehicle : Buffalo Cart
11. National Recreation : Pro-creation

शुक्रवार, नवंबर 03, 2006

Laloo's (Desi) Personal Computer !


Laloo's (Desi) Personal Computer !
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The Logon Screen

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The Start Menu



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Windows Famous Error Message


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The Shutdown Screen

house full

A Bihari goes to a movie hall and asks for two tickets,Do tho ticket dena,the person at the window tells him that there is a house full, so this Bihari says,"koi baat nahin do house full de do."

Extra ticket..

There was this Bihari who was travelling with two tickets, so when the T.T.E asked for the ticket, this fellow gave both the tickets, and so the T.T.E asked him the reason of buying two tickets ,eak tho khoo gai to?( this fellow answered well what will happen if in case I lose one of them), so the T.T.E said "or agar doono khoo gai to?" (what if you lose both of them),so this guy said "to yeh pass kab kam ayaga?" (then why do I have a monthly pass).

बुधवार, अक्तूबर 18, 2006

So Many Jokes !!!

Joke of the Day
Wasim Akram Ka InboX
Sheir-o-Sheiri
jokes thread-Share ur jokes with us
Welcome to DESI jokes & funny poetry forum.
Funny Jokes..
Letter to a Sardar from his Mom
Kon Bol Reya Ay
MEHBOOB OR BHAI
Very Very Fast!
Daily Jokes [Urdu/Punjabi Only] [ABout Pm Member names]
Girls Girls Girls
FUNNY SHAIRE!!
PUNJABI Train...best joke everrr!!
Super me Jokes
Super_me what are you doing?
New technology, take your pictures from PC!!
jokes
GREAT JOKES U WILL LAUGH
Funny Poetry
Punjabi Shayari
Pray and WIn!
Funny Situaltion Songs
CHAK DEY
Aik Masoom Bacha!!!
train ticket joke
Sardar wins lottery
pendu jokes
THE ARMY
AY BAAz
Jugats
Mohd_nadeem\'s Jokes
Read Before Posting
Politics
TOP 5 JoKers (compitition)
Does ur computer speak punjabi:)
Girls with attitude
Cricket Joke.
Atal Behari Vajpayee Musharraf
Last name
HiKashmir Key Barey Main Sheiri!!
CoNGraTuLaTiOnz :D
Karachi Air Trafiic Control
Sharabi
Pagal Tow Kuch Bhi Karsakta....
True Love, a Conversation with GOD
Funny poems
Laugh a little!
mai qaidi no. 786------
Funny Pictures
Airport Joke
Bruce Lee sirf aap ke liyeh
xdzyne jokes
DESI JOKES u know - write urself - NO COPY PASTE JOKES
Post Office
TawaNai
Cricket commentry
New Dates For Pak-Ind Series
Help Me!
Jokes
TERA MERA JOR VI KI
Murgi wala
Joke Competition [Must Check]
indian and pakistani
Breaking News
cricket jokes
Kids in the yrs 3000
LAHORE
Watch the two persons fight
ToT-BaToT..Coming Soon
Hasan_007 Jokes
Funny SMS
IPod vs Cassets.
Bijlii
Rules from Men;s Side
HISAAB
Sardar at the Store
Ashar's Jokes
New at the Job
Hell!
Pakistani and Indian!
Joke (Viewer discretion Advised) not suitable for under 18
Sadar Jee
Few Sardar Jokes (Very Funny)
Barber....
pakistani on the sun"
Billlo and Tillllo (((LMAO))))
Teacher and Student JOKES : Funny
Clever Jokes!!!!
Indian cricket : lol
A pakistani, an Indian ((lmao))
cricketics presents sher or shayari(more sher added)check in
Jokes about cricket(all r there now)
Just unbelieveable
Computer Problem, a real joke
Inzamam vs Sourav Ganguly (Very Funny)
Passing an exam
Ugly Baby
Future Movies Of The IT World
If an insect falls into a glass of Pepsi, then:
Classic definitions and cool meanings:
Cool Jokes
HUM TUM ALL OVER
GarFeild ComicS!!!
Latest Funny SMS
Share Cricket Jokes in Funny-Sher-o-Sheiri
Cricket Jokes As per request
Howzzat! Cricket to have 4th stump
ganguly in funny situation for some players
sms
kiya hwa
nice & gr8
HarbhajanShould be banned byICC because he chucks - Ganguly
Why cant an Indian Sehwag marry a Pakistani grl??
Ghazals
sight screen
thats really really funny - check in and reply
newton dies...........why?
College Rule
Daily Jokes!
Classic Cricket Joke!!
Story u will love..
ICC changes Rules to bring Ganguly back to Form
Examination Question Papers
LaSh JoKeS By LaSh BaNdA OmEaR!
LaRkIyOn Ki KhOoBsUrTi Ka RaAz By LaSh BaNdA OmEaR!
FaIr N LoVeLy Ka KaMaL By LaSh BanDa OmEaR!
Akhir haina Pakistani
Tot batot ka nana
Punjlish
Jokes By LaSh BaNdA OmEaR! (OMEAR IS BACK)
FuNnY ShAiRi (only band n shairs) By LaSh BaNdA OmEaR!
sachin and gangs
cricketers funny jokes
Three PAKISTANIS and three INDIANS
Ask to increase
Singh's Rap
A womans close friend
musab and me ;-)
You know you're living in 2004 when...
sardarji the detective
sardarji at the beach
CRICKET: As explained to a foreigner....
Collection of Sardar Ji Jokes!
english movie titles in urdu
Ridle( Phali but its funny )
Software ke Phoooll
Sardar Ji Jokes
Pak police and their DRYING ROOM
May 9th chuckle
Sneaky professor
Sardarji And His New Maruti
A to Z of a DESI'S Philosophy
Reality about Bruce Lee..Enjoy
Happy Meal
sardarji in Kitchen
Sher-o-Shayeri by ~Pakistani~Munda~
Japanese Proverb..Interesting..
sardarji Series by nabze
bill gates
aint a desi joke but still.....
ganguly to his teammates
indian actors playing cricket
some jokes
Santa and Banta~~~
Fun Tonic
If Microsoft Made Cars....
Red&White (can be offensive to readers)
jokes..
Joke of the day!!!!!lolzzz
Popli ka Popat
What is RED and goes TRING TRING? [Funny]
Made in china.
Not desi...but still t3h funnay
My mother taught me...
Indian Cricket Team Kidnapped
Pakistan's new Pace Sensation!!!
In honor of stupid people!!!
The married man's perspective..... (not desi)
More Jokes -- sardars are GREAT YAAR
AAAAH..George Bush
Sardarni with her 8 Sons
Sardar ki biwi ka antim sanskar
2 Most Imoprtant things!!
pilot sardaar ji
Female Pilot
is akhtar a better cricketer or a better human being
Full form of Singh
Some cool Jokes
Life Saver
Nice Shairi...Part one...check this out :)
Interview
Miandad vs Kapil Dev
j()K€z By ƒarøøK
Dead Sachin!!!
Nice Shairi...Part 2...check this out
Surgery Joke
Conversation LOL
Sardar"s Exam
Paki police
Nice Shairi...Part 3...check this out
Funnnnnnnnnnnnnnnny yar [MERGED] khubaib
Letter to a Sardar from his dear MOM
Jokes
funny jock
Girl proposes Sardar
---------------Hisaab -Kitaab
Do Batain
Eb mujey rat
My Whole Sardar Collection
Read Navjots "SIDDHUISM"
qUESTION aNSWER
Engineer's interview
Significance of email address
One more joke on Sardar
Tum Chinese Ho? (Sardar)
Mental Hospital
Real Father!
Laloo as a Principal
Laloo on a Plane
Laloo solving a puzzle
KBC - whose ur daddy?
KBC - 5 questions to Santa Singh
That's because we are Paki!
2 pagel
Fill it up with water
Trust India
Pakistan Army
Star Trek Show - Bush
Sardar at 12 "O" Clock
Awesome
What gender is a 'Computer'?
Speeding Excuse
Watermelons
An Essay by a German
Hahahhha
Almost a joke.
baysharam sardarji
Sardarji
Sardar ji
WelcOmE to india
If men ran the world.....
Chutkalay
Pakistani Hell
Question
Joke
Rule of Bolly-wood a really funny joke.
The players strike back - could this be true ?
Funny song.
Inzi's Interview
Sardarjis Are Not Stupid!! :P
It could have been worse : JOKE
Stupid Questions with Smart Answers
cute letters
Be careful whatu wish for it might come true
Your brain will be refreshed in the next five seconds.....
Short Funny Quotes
Santa Banta Jokes
Parental Guidance (warning)
women r always like this
Best and the worst
Wrong Number
Bank Roberry (FUNNY)
jokes and songs about cricketer
Aajkal kay maulvi
Khairiat poochi thi main nay yaar telephone par! :)
Sardarji is back
The Great Inzi
Interesting SHiaryy n JokeS
Interesting Questions
Wife and Husband
Nice hairdo by Tariq Amin
A Wise Young Muslim Boy
Explosion puts Englands tour of Pakistan in jeopardy
Age and Treachery
Tendulkar and Kambli
Musharraf, Vajpayee, Madhuri Dixit and Margaret Thatcher
Guts!
Inzamam the funny Joke Read It
Sardars at their Best (really funny)
The Smartest Man In The World
Gabbar sends Kaalia ) realy funný
Funny Thoughts :)
Ways to Turn Down Men ) really funny
10 most stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations
Parental guidance advised
Corporate Lessons
Funnie Jokes:. ) Really funny
Paragon Hard Disk Manager Pro 6.01.847
Definition Of A Bbq
Doctor
SOME INTERSTING DEFINITIONS...... funny
Bewafaa B20
A, B, C
How did you die? ) funny..
The truth about men...
Dill Ke Tanhaai
Unka(DOSTON KA) Intezzar
Meray sathi meray Ansoo
Fasana Mere Taqdeer ka
Meray dil kee Maut kay Lamhat
uss (DILL) kay ANSOO
Tomhari bewafaii......
Pull ur hairs out if u cant answer!!!!!
kool 1
Over Clever
Email... ) funny
some thing about men...:)
guardian angel..!!!hehehhe
wo aur main,,funny
chashma,!!
English 2 Urdu translations.....
Evolution Of Man:
Women's view on men!!
Cricket Jokes.
A nice cricket joke
Types of Aashiqs in India & Pakistan
Khosh
Tu hai meri jind veeeee
Soch di me rendi channaaa
Oh tere to mera dhoor jaan no jii ni karda niii
Nagan bann ke dangea kurri ne
era na di tumma pe giaa
Na badnaam gareeba da
Windows 97 in Urdo:)
Jazzbat
Apno Kee bewafaaii
danger!!1000 volts:
Classic Definitions & Cool Meanings:)
My own Shair ab Kaiya kroon
basera
More of sardars
hehehe!!
connection timed out..!!
Dreams of Men
funny conversationz:) :)
Elevator Magic - Very Funny
What Men Really Mean...
To IMPRESS a WOMAN and a MAN) Really funny
More of sardar jokes
Apno ke Bewafai Aur Humari Wafa ke Had....
Life isn't fair to men..........yeh right!!!
3 wishes:)
Language of Love..:)
3 Monkeys:)
SO! Who is the BOSS???????????
VERRRRRY HIGH CLASS SHAAYRI....for those with taste!!!
Two Black Eyes!
Supppperrrr Sardar!
What Every Man Expects in a Wife:
Main Kaise Paida hua abbu? ...How was I born?
Marriage, 6days???6 weeks?????6 years????? really funny:)
Ever been in a situation like this before
10 commandments of marriage :) :)
Is The Bus a MALE or FEMALE - FUNNY! :)
So where are the dumbest people in the world??????
cricket joke
SecreT of a haPpY maRriagE::::::
blooper
cricket joke2
PM Members Joke
Love Expressions...........
SARDAR in pain !
U know U are Asian When... :)
hehe shari dont know how to spell but tryed lol
stinki bakra
stinkys
one liner
funny joke about pakistan
no inzi just gabbar singh...funny
Revenge
Loolz
Rap Lyrics Translated!!!
Flight 000
Never give Ads in local newspapers why
Accidentsss
Chinese 2 English
3 Men And A River
Hair Cut
some Jokes....
Amazing facts
Kiss:)
Sardar walking down the street
some funny things:)
Windows in Punjabi
You're next:)
Santa and Banta
Reader's Fun :)
Jokes :d
My First Time...:) ps: dont think any thing.... bad
Sardar---New1
a joke and a 3 cricket facts
Sardar Jokes....(Check regularly) will add more
Perfect Couple:)
the wedding
Shiny Apples:)
You Know You're......
sms funny ones
sardar jee
Search
Wishing WELL
Inter related
There were three women:)
Ever WONDER!!!!!
Giving the eye
Forever
Coke
George Bush in a school
Scary Joke....
how girls withdraw money from atm
customer help lol
Cool Things About Being A Man:)
20 TRUE facts about men .... :)
The problems with GIRLS:)
aankhain
Technically correct!!!
Paki Police
U know how to play Cricket?
Our Late Gen Zia Shaib
Taj Mahal
Husband Shopping Center
Julie Aur Sulie
2 * Picture Jokes - Very Funny
Laila Aur MAjnu, Fuuny
The Genie
The Stupidest Man On Earth
Dholkiyan
Pakistani Restroom.....
E-mail To Wife !!
husband on phone
Fred's Note
Johnny's Wagon
Difference between men n women
6 weeks,6months,6 years :)
Talking Monkey
Zia and Bhutto
Sardar Jee aur Motorcycle
three ways of communication
cha gaey sardar jee tay
42 tHINGS tHAT wIll mAKe yOUR pARENTS gO cRAZY hehe
10 reasons
definitions
Driving stles
Never send kiss to your wife:)
Couple and Policeman
Abt having two girlfriends at same time!!! HAHA
God & Laloo
Sardar Jees and a Movie
Definitions Of Marriage-
Best Shair Contest on pakmusic!
old lady driver
funnies
Sardarji & The Exam
male or female?
A bus of Politicians....
Kanwara..."In Urdu"
the mother he never wanted:)
Got Any Raisins?
women always suspicious
What Women Want in a Man
Joke
Funny!!!
Bil Clinton and LAlloo JEE
Change plzzzz.
9/11 an hour earlier
hehehe!!!
Pakiland Ambassador to USA
Funny SMS message and warning also,hehe
funny
weeeee bit (idiot)
Matrimonial Ads: shaadi.com
barber's shop
Jurassic park
Sardarji...... traveling!
knock knock jokes
10 Commandments of a Teenager
Computer Genious
Exceptional Sardarji..............!
Ways girls turn romantic guys down !!!
Interesting Conversation between Dravid & Ganguly
12 Stages Of Luv:)
Funny SMS
~*~ Zaroorrat-e-Rishta ~*~
Boyzz yaaar gussa na kernaa~LOLz
Call centre conversation (real)
A Canadian guy,A English Guy,and a Mexican Guy
A Sardarji and his ears :)
18 Rules For Life
Don't copy if you can't paste
Blonde on Aeroplane
Some funny ones..
Candle Light
Good Manners !!!
women dictionary
Satiya naas loogaan da
Munna Bhai M.B.B.S on Practice
*** Most romantic first line , But second
Apple Time
Brain 4 sale:P
What an invention
Gunga hone main kia mila....
Funky Greeting Cards Texts
Kaun Banega Crorepati Santa Banta Special
Pappu Paas Hogaya!!
why me ?????????????
Birthday Gift
Hamara haal
matlab parast
smart guy!
If bird flu reaches the states, Martial Law will be implemented
:::::SecreT of a haPpY maRriagE::::::
BARBER AND PAKISTANI!! (MUST READ) funny and true!
Engagement!!! ha ha!!
Stupid Teacher!! lollllllll (MUST READ)
Sardar Jokes! lolzzz Funny As Hell!!!
Parrot and Magician!lolzzz (Must Read)
2 Parrots! lolzzz (WAA!!!kia duwaa mangi)
Jon Interview! lolzzzzzzzz
A hindu teacher in a muslim class!!
Mean kid
lost wives....lolzz
Aisi apni Wife ho (Funny Shayri )
inzimam and shoaib akhtar
(¯`·._.·[funny English Sms]·._.·´¯)
Our 21st Century
Computer Programming Song
David's brother David
TRUE Airtraffic Controller Quotes
More of SARDARS JOKE's!! MUST READ ONE'S!!!LOLZZ
B4 MaRrIaGe & AfTeR MaRrIaGe
A Prayer
This is really funny!!!
Mad ppl...
Never Lie to your Wife
Doctor & patient
try this
Indian Mother ...!!
The Prayer
Funny 1's
The Chutney Joke
Ways to annoy people
If an Insect Falls in Your Cup of Coffee, A Joke ;-)
Nawaz Sharif letter on Basant in Arabia
What gender would a computer be?
usman dada is back with sardar jokes! lolzzzz
Cows Eassy
Strange but true....
funny ways 2 propose a girl lol
titanic sank today , what if ?
the perfectt couplee
3 Deaths.....:)
M.p!!!!
never lie to ur mum!
Problems With Guys
islah-e-ghalib
Riddle????
USMAN dada is back with jokes!!
How to Work with Rude Customers
Telenor marketing stretegy
Golfing buddies
Understanding Women
Sikh Jokes
World's Greatest Idiots :D
Baraa Maza Ayaa Gaa
*~~My CoLLecTiOn Of JoKeS~~*
2nd test and after seeing 2nd innings i was mad so wrote this ashaars
Sometimes you just have a really bad day..
The Funeral Service for his wife
New Cricket Rules enforced by ICC!
Question?
Tie Problem
The humour of cricket
Job Application
EngLand Players Convert to Islam(J/k)
a sikh doing bhangra on the death of his brother
A little lesson what women really mean
Money & Accountants
A-z Of The Desi In America!
Usman Dada Is Back!!!!
lalo parsad applied for a job
Who are better friends; Men or Women ?
fUNNNNY:)
FUNNY Shayri
When the body was first made....
jokes by munnakaka
poetryyy
short but sweet
Iq Test
Iq Test
Leave Application
Check this out:)
Barbie's letter to Santa
Funny Tx'z
time pass
white guy doing bollywood
Sardar Special
politicians
Bihari
Racism
Health & Fitness: The Facts
how 2 ask 4 raise n how 2 decline
language
maths
short love story
What this Jamadar means??
Biwi Pakistan gai hai!!
Math Jokes..
workplace jokes :)
Onine Nikkah
Amanat Chan
kitties beatin da cr@p out of others!
sardar dee chalakian
Da Ya Know?
Some Sardar Jokes - Funny!!
Cheating wife
Qazi
Q's u don't ask in Foreign Lands ...
Funny Blog
Brain Exercise
prayer
Does Management know their Staff ??
Hu is the new Leader of China
Sardar ji joke
Funny Pics
Cricket jokes
Prescription
Are you ready
X n Y
Managed Friendship Plan - FAQs
How well do you know your in-laws?
height of somethings
Sardar Gee
Must read this..........
10 most stupid questions
What professor says and means....
THE "n" WORD!
four is equal to 5
These are actual calls to technical support help desks...
what's.........
Valentine Day's Joke
Windows
How to burn a cigerrate
yet another sardar joke
life in the GULF
Denmarkers Accepted Islam
Shaadi ka mujrim
indian and paki Mothers ( Funny)
You've Got Male !!!!!!!!!!! :D
Sum kool Sardar jokes.... :rofl:
Ganguly Jokess
Never trust an old lady
To the restaurant....
An Email inquiry and its response
First Anniversary gift from Bob's wife
east meets west
original inzi interview
Natural Color
Shadi Mubarak
Leter 2 Lotta
Pakistani Brain Tumor
How to avoid Bird Flu
Sardar Sawal
More Sardar Jokes
Pakistanis on the Moon!!!!!
Billo Aunty
Masoom sa Ladka
Oye, Yeh Kaunsi Bari Baat Hai??
a proposal
HAI KOI HUM JAISA (poem)
Bholaji
Laloo Gets offer from Microsoft...
similarties between sharukh ashwereia and murlie
~Deal~
Chinese joke
Communication Skills
girls n computer same? what do u think
girls n comp alike
leter from osam to bush----lolz
the 4 cats
a letter 2 God
u & I
Men r MEN
sooo foolish of mee
top most replies of a girl when u .........soory girls dont mind
9 Things...
Really funny pics - year 3000
Funny Lines for YOU........
Kya Hoga
nursery rhymes.......
2 Monkeys
Practical Joke
Staying Young
Atcual Answering machine Messages
Sardar Special
OR Saneeha Pass hoo gaye
computer terminologies
Computr film namez very funny
English language .......... lol
Real Funny Customer Support Calls (Audio)
The Husband Store ...
Funny quotes, and few laughs
Pagalon k sawal with smart answers!
Love Letter
For all kids who come on this forum
Here are Some Important Laws Which Newton Forgot to State…
Are You Relaxing ?
usman bahie per say wid sardar jokes!!
Intalling husband
aik oor shaadi
super natural powers do they exist
We love u Kukum
Its strange
saneeha a psycho path
defination very funny
new element in periodic table
bag of gold, a poem for smokers
UN Survey
fuuny Quotes about marrige
Love
PANJABI poetry mp3
Married Ones Will Enjoy This More!!!!
Stupid Kaun Hai???
Kaun Marey Ga??
Panda Bear
Divourced
Man Asked his Wife
Two Cows
Difference Between Men and Women
I love U
Young Man
My Motto
Kanjoos
Newton And Sultan Rahi
Chain-smoker.....
Sidhu's funny quotes.
Suicide .....(Poetry)
Modern Prayer by Children
Funny Poetry (Mega Collection)
Chhup gaya badli mein jaake
Married couple rushed
Hyperthreaded Dill .....
A Tragedy (according to BUSH Uncle)lolz
Monkey Story
Professor’s Definition of a Kiss
funyy poetry
Funny poetry 2
George Bush New Poetry --- I'M THE DECIDER
Bandar kee ullad
Honorable MEN ----- Guyz must read
Impact Of Job-change
The Proposal
words of wisdom
You Might Be a Consultant if...
You Might Be a Programmer if...
Ten Commandments for Stress Free Programming
HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE RIGHT JOBv
Exclusive News: Sachin does another first in life...read on!!!
A bunch of kool sms
SARDAR says it all
Salary
Funny Questions and answers
NEW funny Poetrys 8) 8) 8)
Some Other Funny Poetrys 8D 8D
Secret Affairs
Sardar joke!!! Must read
E-Mail
Pakistani Hell !
Khud Khushi
Life Guard
Modern Bacha
Intelligent Haircut
Mr. Bawarchi
Short story :D
do you guys know
Cham Cham....
Wrong number
a story about a person praying
High Octane Hootch (Phunny...)
SultanRahi vs Newton Who Wins
moto gp
911 Calls
Hollywood-Lollywood
Short Joke
Funny Shaire on Mughals
Hu.. YAsir.. Kofi...
camping trip
The Psychology of Stock Market !!!
Exam by Chance !!!
Bush goes to a primary school...
New Husbands..........
Be A Donkey
funny ashaar
how ur marriage works 6 golden rules
Train Ticket
Laloo learns angreji!
Sniffer dog inside plane !@!
A fairy Tale
A journey by PIA
lie detector
sardar ka donkey
amazing recharge option
The door bell
shohar 420
card's sayings
Indian hell
the Push
A lesson
freezing to death
winnin the lottery
hows the weather?
what women want
AIse apne wife hoo
Wife Is A Wife... No Matter Who You Are ?
First divorce related to 9/11!
some funny audios
some funny audios
The Toilet Mystery
Sardar In Mental Hospital
10 Dollars
Twice the size
Bubba Knows Everybody
Nasty but funny PG advised
pakiz r pakiz
a good pathan
intelligent pathan
Sardarjee And Jokes Have The Same Meaning!!
sardar having a chinese baby
The Train Mystery
short question n answers
a real panjabi joke as promised to henna
twinkle twinklw little star
wash basin
Loose Motion
Smart Kid
Employment Opportunity
i loveeeeeee mathzzzzzz
Desi proposal
Bihari-Sardar
Who says Israeli army isnt helpful?
Hamara Pakistan hai
Only in America..
have u evrr seen a baby doing this funny
sms joke
Raja and Rani
a donkey n a sardar
~~ Ultimate truth ~~
Men vs women
Very clever
what do u say to a fat women.........
" guardian angel "
50 Things Everyone Should Know...
Have an affair
Zoology Test
Sardar Sardar Hai
It's Better to Be a Pakistani
Sardars are smart!
A love letter in according to ......
sardarjee's answer
Gifts
Riddle
Valentine's Day
Chain Smoker
Secretary
Ways To maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
Wishes
Saray Ga ma Pa .....:)
Marriage
SARDARS - With Due Respect :)
Wacky Quotes
A Man's Wish
Tere duvar par sanam hazaar baar aayenge,
Kids say the Darndest Things...
Gutts
Sms Jokes
if i could swim.....
Women are Women
Another woman
Punjabi English
main khan born hoye thee
Female parrot
A father in need is a father indeed lolz
Happy Was Too Happy...
Some Tipical Desi Jokes.......
Shehzad Roy ^__^
Santa & Banta
Its a brithday game !!!
Frnds
26 yrs VERY OLD MAN....
Insulted by druggist...
hmm... Wise Jokes.....
Going crazy by looking at jewelery
Funny Joke
Poor man in desert
Pepsi ad
Heee.heee
Clever Sardar
Crazy Boy and Girl
Wardi Of Genral Musharraf.......
Smart Boy,,,, or Pathan........
Hasna Manah hai.........
Funnyyyy........
Opppps....
6 years, 6 Months, 6 Years.. Funny....
Funny Shair......More Funny Every Day(MSN)
Difference Between Work and Prison
old lady
Sardar jee's jokes..!!
80 years and not too old yet ...
One second sir....
Gandhi ki dhoti
Daddy How was I born?
Being late for school
Only when he's drunk
heyyy
Cat in home, Man lost no direction
robery
Funny pictures..
marry meeeeeeeee!
funny funny funny funny funny funny pictures...:)
abhi abhi mery dimag main bara acha joke ayaa..sunyega plz..:)
lipsssssssssssssssssssssss
lolz....yummyyyyyyyyyyy
jus for me
I would have been realsed today..
sardar ji again
ustad/shagird jokes
agar yeh apke saath hua toh???????
truth truth truth truth truth truth
simpleee sa question..
we'll go at night.
The next Indian Love Story
Pehli nazar main he..main uski hogaye..
can u?
Funny shayariii..promise iss baar mery thread se bore nahi honge..:)
Those small meals on the wheel
My Favorites
Aik Zaruri Baat
:)
hi..all...m new here...:)
How we indians are? easy to identify...
jokes in urdu..:)
urdu sms mesages..:)
A little boy and the clergyman
Mazahiyaa shayarii...
Jokes
Log har mod pe ruk ruk ke sambhaltey kyuon hain?
Everyday I'd have a new one.
Out of work mime
how come our baby black!!!
I was sitting on daddy's lap
subha subha
Your Favourite Urdu Poetry Here
That silly no one celebrates that much
bush
teacher n papu
smart
a man n his cat
funny shair
basanti
sardar ji
Jab se Begum nay
hi matematicians
We only marry our relatives.
What do cat and dog think about themselves?
Who Said English is Easy?
Smart kid
Always remember
sardar neira sardar hota he
Main ayi hoon...
Audio Jokes
funny pics lol
Becharie sardar ji
Mr Chabal
Behja
Jokes
car, going to hospital
Sms
$$ Urdu Jokes $$
Paidaishee Khushi
police constable n his son
someone can visit
sardar in love
Kamena
Jokes1
Funny sms!
Move George W Bush by your mouse.
This is really a great suspense...!!!!!
Upgrading from Girlfriend Ver 5.0 to Wife Ver 1.0
joke
kuch hans bhi lo
Don't get caught in a bad pose.
Titanic in 30 seconds!
Sardar jokes from boney_g
Watch this
Write your name on Ice!
GO ahead sardar jee
How he got the gorgeos woman for whole life...
Two voices ... PG Advised
Four worms ... PG Advised
Locked
Army Blast!
bander
To Be Seen By Wanabe Gangsterz!!
Tweeny Fans Must Watch
I am not mad
Tired and Overworked!!!!
Sardar
OH my GOD
Airline Announcements
Where is the god?
COnsequences of AMERICAN LIFE STYLE
Funny World
Ways to annoy people at the Movies
Boss ko such bola karo
Santa at KBC (Kaun banega karodpati)
Expiry Date..lolz
oops!!!! sardar jee!!!! jokes
Is god a man or a woman?
~*~lolz~*~
kia aap k sarr par seengh hai??
Wht did the DR say
Police
Jito yahan Paise hi Paise $$$$$$$$$
$@nT@~B@nT@
Being a hen
Usko kya pata

Look at the Laloo's point

A British Diplomat paid a courtesy visit to Lalloojee. During a Garden party at the Palace, he thought of entertaining Lalloojee with the following magic of numbers.
He said, " Your excellency,Look at the value of the alphabet
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
Now, look at this Sir, if we calculate together it will be
H A R D W O R K
8 1 1 8 4 23 15 18 11 = 98 %
Only
K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96 %
Only
L O B B Y I N G
12 15 2 2 25 9 14 7 = 86 %
Only
L U C K
12 21 3 11 = 47 %
Only Sir, you should look at the final one, which is most important.
A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100 %
Sir, do you find it useful ? This magic can work on your people to improve themselves, increase productivity, and make your Kingdom prosperous. Sir, I can arrange to send our experts to coach your people. We can do it in less than a year
"Lalloojee thought for a while and said," I have better formula. See this......
C O R R U P T I O N
3 15 18 18 21 16 20 9 15 14 = 149 %...................
Do you want me to come and teach your people ?
I can do it in less than one week."

Laloo meets God


Saddam Hussein, Pervez Musharraf and Laloo lined up to meet God. Saddam Hussein goes to God and asks him "God when shall I see the defeat of Bill Clinton?
"God replies " Son, you will not see it in your lifetime. "Hearing this, Saddam Hussein starts crying and goes away.
Pervez Musharraf goes to God and asks him "God when shall I see the capture of Kashmir by Pakistan?
"God replies " Son, you will not see it in your lifetime. "Hearing this, Pervez Musharraf starts crying and goes away.
Laloo goes to God and asks him "God when shall I see Bihar becoming a prosperous and happy state?" Hearing this, God starts crying. Laloo is astounded and asks "Oh God, why are you crying?
"God replies: " Son, I will not see that it in my lifetime".

Laloo At Swimming Pool

Lifeguard at swiming pool: "Hey, Mr. Lalloo, I've been watching you for last 15 days and you will have to stop urinating in the swimming pool like this”. Lalloo: “Hum hi nahi, Sabhi yehi karte hai” Lifeguard shouts: "Not from the diving board?"

Corp. and Cows


American : Sell half the cows in markets all over the world. Convince each of the remaining cows to produce milk of four cows. Later when there is a slight drop in milk produced, lay them off.
French : Have some cows. Go on strike because they want more cows.
Japanese : Redesign the cows to one-tenth the size of regular cow. Later expect the cows to work 25 hours a day.
German : Re-engineer the cows. So, they live for 100 years, eat only once a month, survive all weather conditions and give beer instead of milk.
Italian : Have some cows but don't know where they are. So, break for lunch.
Russian : First decide to count cows and learn to have 5 cows. Second count gives 42 cows. Third count gives 12 cows. Decide to stop counting now but resume it after another bottle of vodka.
Mexican : They are told that they have cows, but don't know how a cow looks like. So decide to take a nap.
Swiss : Has millions of cows, none of which belongs to them. Decide to store them for others.
Chinese : Have some cows. Sign a contract with American Corporation and sell milk to them.
British : Have couple of hundreds of cows. Not staistfied. Gets an order from Buckingham Palace to take control of cows all over the world.
Brazilian : Have only two cows. Starts a new Corporation of dairy products. Next day declares bankruptcy.
Singaporian : Have few cows. Immediately, starts thinking to open a new shopping center for cows.
Indian : Have many cows. First worship them, then milk them and then before selling mix water into milk.
Pakistani : Have some cows, all received from parent Corporation in India. Still try to exercise claims on cows owned by Indian Corporation.

Letter writing

Lalloo was about to write a letter to Rabri. He remembers that last time she was reading his previous lettervery very slowly as she can not read fast.So, Lalloo thinks for a while and start writing with the first line ‘My Dear Rabri, I know you can not read fast. Don't worry. I will make it easy for you, I am writing this letter very very slowly.'

On Padyatra

Lalloo was doing ‘Padyatra’ through the villages in Bihar during election time. He felt thirsty and decided to ask at a hut for some water.Lady from hut opens the doors and get angry to see Lalloo but without showing her anger she invites him in with a smile. She gives him water in bowl.There was a one dog moving around, giving Lalloo a great deal of attention. Lalloo comments "What a nice dog, I had never seen such a friendly dog".Lady replies "Ah, he's not that friendly. That's his bowl you are using."

Goes to Delhi

Lalloo decides to file his application form for assembly election of Bihar. So goes to election office in Patna-Bihar and takes the form. He is about to start filling it but suddenly stops and tells his secretary “Humara Delhi ka ticket book karo. Hum ye faram Delhi me pura karenge”.Surprised secretary asks “Aap ye faram Delhi mein hi kyo bharana chahate ho”.Lalloo replies “Are bhai ishi faram mein likha hai - Write in Capital”.

With Mulayam

Lalloo and Mulayam agreed to settle their dispute by a fight and it was understood that whoever wanted to quit should say "Bas Karo". Mulayam got Lalloo down and was hammering him unmercifully even though Lalloo shouted several times "Bas Karo, Bas Karo" but Mulayam paid no attention and kept on hammering Lalloo. A bystander said, "Why don't you let him get up? Don't you hear him say Bas Karo?"Mulayam says "I do hear him, but he's such a liar, you can't believe hima

Job in New York

Lalloo gets fed of Bihar and decides to settle in USA. He lived in Staten Island, New York, and worked in Manhattan. He had to take the ferryboat to his office and back home. One evening, when he riches ferry and finds that there is some more time for next ferry boat. So Lalloo decides to go to nearby pub. After long time suddenly he looks at watch and finds it was too late to catch the ferry boat. Thinking that ferry has left the gate, he goes running to ferry gate and finds that ferry is just eight feet away. With all his energy he runs very fast and make a long jump directly on the deck of ferry. Lalloo was thrilled at own successful jump. Sailor on the deck was surprised. Lalloo asked the Sailor "Did you not like my jump, buddy?" Sailor says "It was great, but why didn't you wait? We were just pulling in!"

With Bill Clinton

Lalloo went to US and had a meeting with Bill Clinton. Clinton says “Lalloo, I want to show you the technological progress of US, come with me”. Clinton takes Lalloo into deep forest and ask Lalloo to start digging. Tired Lalloo looks at Bill Clinton but Bill tells “Dig further don't stop”. Lalloo starts again. Bill says “More , more”. Finally at 200 feet Lalloo finds a wire. Lalloo says “Bill, I found the wire”. Bill says “You see that proves we had telephone 100 years back”.
Frustrated Lalloo at the end of US tour invites Bill Clinton to Bihar. Later when Clinton arrives in BiharLalloo tells Clinton “Come with me and I will show you the progress made by Bihar”. Lalloo takes Bill to the forest and ask him to dig. After some time Bill Clinton stops and look at Lalloo. Lalloo says “Bill Saheb go on digging”. After sometime Bill gets tired and looks at Lalloo. Lalloo says “Go on digging don't stop” Bill Clinton digs further and reaches 200 feet and finds nothing. Frustrated Bill Clinton “What is this, I don't find anything even at 200 feet”. Lalloo laughs and says “Sir, that is our progress, 100 years ago we had gone wireless telephone”

Search Disneyland


Lalloo on his USA tour reaches Orlando. He decides to drive himself to go to Disney Land. He hires a car and drives thru LA strictly as per road map and road signs. Finally, he reaches close but does not see any Disney sign. After long search Lalloo gets fed up and drives into gas station and asks the person inside. Person replies "Ohhhh…..Disney, Left ....” .Frustrated Lalloo turns around and drives back home.

Travel in Plane

Lalloo boards the plane for Patna and takes the sit in first class section. Airhostess approached Lalloo and requested him to move to economy class as he did not have a Business class ticket. Lalloo replied, "I'm Lalloo-Chief Minister of Bihar, and I'm not moving."Not wanting to argue, Airhostess asked the Co-pilot to speak to Lalloo. He went to Lalloo, asking him to move out of the Business class section. Lalloo replied, "I'm Lalloo-Chief Minister of Bihar, and I'm not moving."Co-pilot returned to the cockpit and told the Captain about situation. Captain said, "I am from Bihar, I know how to handle Lalloo."Captain went to Lalloo whispered in Lalloo's ear. Lalloo immediately jumped out of his seat and ran to the Economy class.Surprised, Airhostess and the Co-pilot asked Captain what he said to Lalloo.Captain said, I told him “The Business class section of plane will not be going to Patna."

Hunting


Lalloo decides to go for hunting lion along with his other 2 friends. The first friends hunts 1 lion. Lalloo asks him “How did you got lion hunt”. Friend replies “I saw tracks, followed tracks and shot a lion”.Second friend also gets lion hunt. Lalloo ask same question. Friend replies “I saw tracks, followed tracks and shot a lion”.Lalloo says OK I will go for lion hunt and get 2 lion hunts. Lalloo returns with broken bones. Friends ask Lalloo what happened Lalloo say “I saw tracks, followed tracks but got hit by train”

Brain Purchase

A young man aspiring to become politician decides to replace his brain by a political person's brain. He goes to doctor. Doctor tells him “Only 2 brains are left”. Man curiously asks “Whose are those and what is the price”.Doctor tells him “Vajpayee's brain for Rs.2 and Lalloo's brain for Rs.2,00,000”.Man is amazed at prices and asks doctor “Why Lalloo's brain much more costlier than Vajpayee's”.Doctor replies “Vajpayee's brain was used a lot”.

Mail Box


Lalloo gets new computer as well as free Internet connection. After 2/3 days he goes out side his house to check his letterbox.His neighbor keeps an eye on Lalloo.Lalloo finds no letters in the box, so goes back inside his house. One minute later,again he comes out and checks the letterbox. He finds no letters and goes back. One minute later, again he comes outside to check his letterbox and for the 3rd time he finds no letters in the box. Now, Neighbor is confused. One minute later, Lalloo again comes out 4th time to check the letterbox. This time, his neighbor tells "Lallooji, postman 3 ghante ke baad ayega. Bar bar letterbox nahi dekho". Lalloo responds, “Bhai mera computer bar bar bol raha hai - You have got mail”

Car Lights

Lalloo's wife was driving a car with Lalloo sitting next to her. She suspects that cars left and right turn signals not working. So she stops the car on the side of the road and asks the Lalloo if he doesn't mind stepping out of the car to check the turn lights while she tests them. Lalloo steps out and stands in front of the car. Lalloo's wife turns on turn signal lights and ask him "Abhi ye light chalu hai kya nahi bolo"Lalloo responds "Chalu hai....Chalu nahi hai....Chalu hai.... Chalu nahi hai....Chalu hai....Chalu nahi hai…. "

Smoker


Lalloo goes to a cigarette shop and asked “Bhai ek Will dena”.Guy selling the cigarettes told Lalloo “Hey Mr. There is nothing by the name of Will, it is Wills” But Lalloo insisted for Will. So the person told him angrily “Unless you say it correctly as Wills I won't sell it to you” Lalloo went mad and said "Hum sahi bol rahen hai, Hum ek hi to maang rahen hain pura packet nahin maang rahen hain".

Hunt for pig


Lalloo was traveling by car along a country side road in Bihar, when all of a sudden a piglet jumps in front of the car. The piglet dies on the spot. Lalloo gets upset, send his chauffeur to find the owner of the piglet so that he can pay the damages. Chauffeur returns with a bag full of money with a wondering look on his face. Lalloo asks the driver “what happened”. Driver says “When I reached the village, I told villagers that the pig came under the car which was driven by me". They all gathered around me and I thought I will get beating of my lifetime from villagers. At the end I told them "I am Lalloo's driver”.Then they started collecting money and given me.

शुक्रवार, अक्तूबर 13, 2006

शनिवार, अक्तूबर 07, 2006

Shayari

mumkin nahi sahayad kisi ko samaj pana, samjey bna kisise dil lagana, bahutasaan hai kisi ko pyar karnabahutmuskil hai kisi ka 'PYAR' pana

Shayari

tum hamari ho nahi saki iska dukh nahi hai.........magar dukh is baat ka hai ki ,terey mohabbat main woh dum nahi tah.

Shayari

Kabhi Mujh Ko Saath Lekar, Kabhi Mere Saath Chal KarWoh Badal Gaye Achaanak Meri Zindagi Badal Kar Huyee Jis Pe Meharabaan Tum, Koi Khush_Naseeb Hogaa Meri Hasaratein To Nikaliin Mere Aansuuon Mein Dhal Kar

शुक्रवार, अक्तूबर 06, 2006

Shayari

aaj bhi kayi sawaal hain is dil me , pyaar ka ghambezubaan hai iss dil mein, kuch keh nahi paata yedilmagar,kisi dil ke liye bahut pyaar hai is dil mein.

Shayari

Sabhi ko sab kuchh nahi milta, Nadi ki har lehar ko sahil nahi milta!Yeh dil walon ki dunia hai ajab, Kisi se dil nahi milta to koi dil se nahi milta!!

Shayari

socha tha iz kadar unko bhula jayenge......dekh kar bhiandekha kar jayenge....par jab jab samne aya unkachehra....socha iz baar dekh lete hai....agli baarbhool jayenge

रविवार, सितंबर 10, 2006

Giant Hotdog


Creative Advertising


Coffee Dog


Poop and Putt


Tired Kitten


This job stinks


The Slave Kitten


The Bald Werewolf


Super Squirrel


Pierced!


Mexican SUV


Laptop Hatred


Sexy Salad


Michael Jackson's Cameo


Hungry Baby


Goodbye Cruel World


Ghetto Shoe Bike


Forbidden Lovers