!! University final examination !!

Laloo ji is appearing for his University final examination.

He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window.

He then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His shirt, pant, socks and watch follow suit.

The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on.

"Oye, I am only following the instructions yaar," he says,? it says here,'Answer the following questions in brief'.

!! Lie Detector !!

An Englishman, an American and a laloo ji are called upon to test a lie detector .

The Englishman says:"I think I can empty 20 bottles of beer".

BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.

"Ok", he says, "10 bottles".

And the machine is silent.

The American says: "I think I can eat 15 hamburgers".BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.

!! Regular glasses !!

A policeman was testing Laloo Ji, Manmohan Ji and Atal Ji who were training to become detectives.

To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows Manmohan Ji a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it. "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"

Manmohan Ji answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!" The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side profile.

"Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at Atal Ji and asks him, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?

" Atal Ji smiles and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!" The policeman angrily responds,

"What's the matter with you two? Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?

"Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to Laloo Ji and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?

He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a stupid answer." Laloo Ji looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses." The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not.

"Well, that's an interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that." He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file in his computer, and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.

"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does in fact wear contactlenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"

"That's easy," Laloo Ji replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear."